THE SUPER (well, not too bad really) NOTES

ref YE SITE PROPER,
AN ILLUSTRATION OF,
IT’S RAISON D’ETRE
(A Project for World Domination – but for Blackpool)
+
MOST IMPORTANTLY,
A CAMPAIGN AGAINST THE HIGH PRICE OF CHIPS.

So:
Our Dogs Arse : NOT FOR PLEBS
If No News Is Good News,
How Is It They Keep Manufacturing It ?
Joined-Up Government = Joined-Up Responsibility
ODA : Illustrating The Continuity of Crap
ODA : Distinguishing between The Stick and The Beater
ODA : Espousing wot you’re thinking
/
We think you should be thinking !
So, ODA, A Rant Sheet of Taste : Good/Bad ?
Now, that is a Q !
Just give it a sniff and enjoy our organ !

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Dedication:
To ‘The days before the world went lax and sour’
Big Jim & The Figaro Club.

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2013 : WEEK 40 : Day 276
Thursday 03-October-2013

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THE DAILY ENLIGHTENMENT

Continuing our postal theme of recent:

We repeat a previous on that esteamed font of probity, mssrs GS4
(or is that G$S ? – who cares?).
First published after Gthingy were found to have a rather elastic attitude to
cause and effect and with a very well developed gift for creative accountancy.

+

! Home Learning !
! Budding Business Students !
! Enrol Now !
! On The Gisco-CSgas4U Creative Accountancy Course !
! Government Recommended !
! Send us your URL and we’ll keep you tagged !
! Once you’re on our programme not even death will stop us keeping you on track !

+

To Point:
THEY’RE RESURGING TO BE ONE OF THE FRONT RUNNERS TO REPLACE
THE PRESENT UK MAIL SERVICE
WHICH IS AT PRESENT UNDER THE WARD OF AND ARE OVERSEEN BY HM !

(See Ours Previous on this asset strip particular)

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ODA H&S NOTICE
STAY OUT OF CENTRAL MANC UNTIL THE END OF THE WEEK.
IT’S STILL POO FOR NORMAL PEOPLE ALBEIT ALL IS NOW
GRADUALLY BEING BROUGHT BACK TO BEARABLE.

( Poo Condition Amber and improving )

* *

THE DAILY ASSPECT

ODA HOME-OFFICE DESK

The National Theatre of The Absurd 2013 tour has come to an end with the concluding scene of  Main Act III

‘CONNING IT‘ a tragedy in many parts ended yesterday and the crew gave a final sods opera from the the top of the tower before submerging for their voyage to Westminster where the are expected to surface tomorrow, go into dock, have any embarrassing accumulated barnacles removed from their bottom, and continue their mission proper on Monday. What has been noted already in this interim (interregnum ?!) from their present sub-surface long-wave transmissions is a reiteration of their exhortation to the masses, their now standing message nach Haupt Fuhrer Dave von Cotswold:
! Arbeit Macht Frei !

Und Fruenden Freunden, Vorgessen Sie Nicht !

Vote for Hr Cameron

Grosse Dave Lieber Dicht

(The voting booth is still at the end of the wagon-carriage, to the right of the guillotine)

+

See the prize giving below today’s reports.

+ + +

GOD SAVE BORIS (always)

+ + +

ref ‘Pay-Day Loans’ UK

Wot has now become a regular furore of decreasing periodicity and increasing ferocity, has again and predictably resurged. Much wailing and gnashing of wot’s left of teeth is heard. People of good heart various are again banging the drum for Government regulation proper.

After another select committee* and others similar and dissimilar investigations,
(*Nice little earners if you get on one Charles),
DaveCo-lite has pronounced and issued stern word thingies of which the guts of
(if you can call them that / such as they are)
are to be be ‘enforced’ next April (2014) ! ! ! ! ! !

+

ODA RESPECTFULLY REMINDS THE HUDDLED MASSES
of
OUR PREVIOUS ON THIS:

The Romans sorted all for themselves by restricting max interest rates to 8%.
So, wot have the Romans done for us on this one?
Well fuck-all now as they’re no longer about with bunches of whippy twigs to enforce things, AND NEITHER IS ANY FUCKER ELSE !

+ +++ +

! LATE NIGHT EXTRA !

! DON’T BE ARSED TO READ IT !
! FIND SOMETHING USEFUL AND INTERESTING TO DO !
Helpful suggestion:
The UK Porridge Setting Championship starts tomorrow in InverThingy
The overnight express leaves in 40 min.

To point if you can bear it:
The Chain-Mail has resurged, chipping away at Milliwatt & Co.
A bad taste op by The Mail on Someday of gate crashing a Milliwatt private family do has come off.
This time in the aftermath of the predictable Milliwatt wailing, a certain Alistair Campbell*
(no relation) has been given an injection of something and dragged out reluctantly kicking and screaming from the shadows to add to the soup.

And yea, luvvy will provide publicity for luvvy,
who will then blame the other luvvy
who will call on the services of another luvvy,
who will . . ……
and so ad infinitum.
(From The Book of Tony.  Ch I V.1)

All said, I think you will all enjoin with ODA in chorus of sympathy,
along with the presently part recalcitrant/part regretting Mailings,
towards the injured Milliwatts . . ……
THERE IS NO BUSINESS LIKE SHOW BUSINESS
etc.

That’s enough for tonight, TBC tomorrow –
No doubt by the whole of the UK media pack.
Don’t expect too much from us – Not sure we’re up to it.

Your Circulating Manager
A. D. Nauseam

*Weddings, funerals and barmitzvahs etc
Tenth of the cost of Blair for after dinner speeches
All-in prices – no ex’s.

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ODA COLONIAL DESK

The western outpost has gone BUST !
(So they say)
It appears all the current unpleasantness at home in Washington DC hasn’t mithered the expedition to their furthest outpost (that we know about !) in the least, viz:
Although 97% of NASA staff have been told to stay at home for the mo’,
Mars rover ‘Discovery’ has carried on happily trundling about its new patch
digging&sniffing, sniffing&digging all on its own accord using its on-board autopilot kit.

Meanwhile back at the ranch . . ……
Buddy can you spare a plaster/ absolutely anything ?

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ODA FOREIGN DESK

THOSE IN ISOLATION LOCAL
(Well near-ish – Off-lying ‘Continent’ type thingy)

All ~as/ last
The Wops are still going through one of their frequent bouts of parliamentary nonsense.
(There’s no business like show bus, etc)
The Greccos are continuing to twist everything to put a cap and collar on Golden Dawn.
Garlec Beret is still out to lunch.
El Dago is thinking of doing-over the Gib border again,
chucking more donkeys off anywhere handy and ecclesiastical,
repealing wot little there is of the anti-bullfighting regulations,
putting wot’s left of the national kitty into yet more football stadia;
all to appeal to and pacify his grumbling proles
whilst rail-roading new Trans-Eurinal high-speed rail lines through anywhere he fancies.
(So nothing fresh there then and business as usual)
aber
Again Auntie Angela appears relatively happy and that’s all that matters.

🙂

~~~ ~~~ etc

THOSE IN ISOLATION FAR
THOSE WHO ARE REALLY REMOTE
[The poor souls who are even further past Stalybridge]

The Iraq mess : ? Reports thin but thought again as/ last – still improving a little
+

Others : WIP. Come back soon

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Finally from The 2013 Travelling Theatre of The Absurd, The Whacky Race Results:

THE UK POLITICo PROFESSIONAL BULLSHITTER OF THE YEAR COMPETITION
for
JUST WHO CAN SELL THE BUGGERS THE BIGGEST ONE THIS YEAR ?

End of Race Report:

The Stewards Enquiry is now concluded:

In reverse order:
Farage N. on the UKIP mount has been nominated as overall last in race although a small retro compensation prize has been held back for 2 years to see if ‘The Scourging of Godfrey‘ was indeed a recognised pro-scam.
In third place:
Milliwatt on a dressed-up old nag, makes a predictable third having trotted through the race emitting regurgitated promises of salvation from many years ago; last heard in the days before St Tony.
In second place:
The favourite, Driven-Dave, although having emitted the most dodgy of the dodgy has been put to second place as it has been argued he shouldn’t have been in the race in the first place having picked-up a make-weight that has helped him no end all of which really doesn’t add-up for the stewards.
So to the overall winner:
Clegg N on Wooly-Nonce
This dark and shady horse and it’s ability to do quick u-turns in mid stride, dropping large dollops of poo on all and sundry but of most point, on its own supporters,
have persuaded the stewards and they have awarded the Tony Blair Memorial Trophy to him.

Much thanks to our source:  Paddy Power (obviously)

The Tony Blair Memorial Cup will be presented to the winner
in The Members Tea Room, after prayers, first Monday in Advent.

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YE SUB NOTES

PRE : As/ last:
ref YE POSTS:
Continuing the opening of our Posts to Subscribers Service, we’re still stumbling a bit
(SNAFU)
and we continue to pray indulgence from our readers for the future hopefully short
until we have sorted formatting to as best as can be done for the system raft we float on.
Again, it looks as though there will only be x1/day as ye esteamed system won’t allow more.
Should you not receive for any day particular try accessing that particular one from the site proper.
SUNDAYS:  Expect pub’ of our std declaration of day of rest + any special notices of the time.
Future Intentions:
But for Sundays, to do a regular daily ‘double-do’ with AM+PM publications with an updated Asspect at PM
(See above, thought unlikely at the mo’ : Best laid plans etc !)

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THE STANDING NOTES

ref STYLE of WRITE

As/ The Site Proper.
NB Much but not all done to a continuous stream of script without punctuation proper or additional space break etc ie As/a continuous rant would sound as after all it is A RANT SITE

!

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ref YE SITE PROPER

THE WOM PAGE

1: As/ last:
Changes of layout to The Wom Page on the site proper are yet still continuing and might confuse a little at the mo’, as this past week/so of Daily Posts must have also done !
Again, please bear with us and it’ll be brought to logical soon
(If we are spared !)

2: ref THE DAILY + WEEKLY COPY USUAL:
Due to illness (ahhh we hear from the masses)
we’ve largely suspended the regulars full and proper:
The Daily Asspect + The Daily Enlightenment + The Weekly Look-Back
Do hope to be back up to full speed some time
In the meantime we précised/metamorphosed wot would have been full copy to the above into Organi’s view of the world:
The Fourth Eye of The Wom Page:
A summary posting of
DAILY ASSPECT + ENLIGHTENMENT + WEEKLY LOOK BACK PAGES

We now put The Fourth Eye to this (hopefully) daily posting

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ref THE TEXTUALS – THE DAILY ENLIGHTENMENT – THE STYLE
ref The Piece(s) Above + Previous + To Come (if we are spared)
ref The E-Steamed Wisdom Contained Therein:

For New Recipients – Yes, we do know:

1:
They are for the most part, gutter humour.
ie 1: They are quite, quite, quite  vulgar for the most part.
ie 2: They’re mostly quite crude, lewd and rude (some very much so)
+
Throw-in bland, infantile, inane, and gratuitously outrageous for good luck where they apply
(often !)
and you’ve got a fairly accurate picture of just wot is contained usual.
🙂
An Aside:
–> Ah, The Gutter : It’s where we live <–
No Apologies : There’s no place like home etc.
🙂
Ergo: Should you live on the kerb or above, some might well cause offence.
🙁
The easy way for the delicate to deal with it if you don’t want to
take heed of the sentiments of the nice polite version on The Site Proper Wom (Home) Page:
GO AWAY NOW.
aka Piss-Off You Princess.
🙁
🙂

2:
You might well have seen or heard said some of the pieces below somewhere else before,
indeed some of them are so old they’re probably pensionable,
but please don’t show-off by telling us where and when they seen.
To date gentlefolk other of
The Parish of St ODA
might well not have had the benefit of the profound illumination & enlightenment contained therein and shed by them.
We don’t claim copy-write on them – Share & Enjoy.

3:
With ref to the genre general:
The only things we’re trying to do for the better than the rest of the rabble,
is to publish in a form matching the idiom of the piece particular,
in as intelligible a form as can be writ by us with attempt to render print layout to wot is thought best practice for clarity of read on the many devices various ‘out there’.
Where possible for retention of that idiom intrinsic to the piece,
that form is put to something akin to The Queen’s English.
Oh, and we’re trying not to repeat the same one after publication as well.

* * *

So, Dear Reader,
The TEXTUALS in summation,
is a torrent of banal filth, innuendo, outrageous lies, smears and distortion,
general character assassination to bods various
all tastefully counterpointed with ‘politically incorrect’ anarchistic truths and insights
into the greater world
+
The ODD flash of divine inspiration and enlightenment absolute
combined with good taste proper
(Very few and little though !)
🙂
Further: See our

General Statements of Stance

on

The Site Proper

Wom* Page

also.

(* The ‘Home’ Page : Fer’t foreigners from past Stalybridge)

+ + +
A Sponsor Writes:

Reet Good.
Couldn’t do better mi sen.
Double coconuts all round.

Godd J.
Villa Omni
Heaven
H101 WC666
(No junk mail or callers without appointment please)
+ + +

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Clear Views
+
Regards,

Yours through das mist (ja wohl)
Old :

🙂

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