THE SUPER (well, not too bad really) NOTES

ref YE SITE PROPER,
AN ILLUSTRATION OF,
IT’S RAISON D’ETRE
(A Project for World Domination – but for Blackpool)
+
MOST IMPORTANTLY,
A CAMPAIGN AGAINST THE HIGH PRICE OF CHIPS.

So:
Our Dogs Arse : NOT FOR PLEBS
If No News Is Good News,
How Is It They Keep Manufacturing It ?
Joined-Up Government = Joined-Up Responsibility
ODA : Illustrating The Continuity of Crap
ODA : Distinguishing between The Stick and The Beater
ODA : Espousing wot you’re thinking
/
We think you should be thinking !
So, ODA, A Rant Sheet of Taste : Good/Bad ?
Now, that is a Q !
Just give it a sniff and enjoy our organ !

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Dedication:
To ‘The days before the world went lax and sour’
Big Jim & The Figaro Club.

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2013 : WEEK 40 : Day 275
Wednesday 02-October-2013

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THE DAILY ENLIGHTENMENT

Continuing our postal theme of recent:

A Nigerian bloke arrived in a parcel at my place this morning.
Nice lad but some bastard’s black mailing me.

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CONNING IT : WE CONTINUE TO LIVE THROUGH  PERISCOPE UP DAVE TIME

ODA H&S NOTICE IMMEDIATE
STAY OUT OF CENTRAL MANC UNTIL THE END OF THE WEEK.
IT’S STILL ABSOLUTE POO FOR NORMAL PEOPLE.

* *

THE DAILY ASSPECT

ODA HOME-OFFICE DESK

The National Theatre of The Absurd 2013 comes to an end with the concluding scene of  Main Act III

‘CONNING IT‘ a tragedy in many parts ends today with Scene 5.

First a message nacht Diener Haupt Fuhrer on behalf of The Conservative Party
! Arbeit Macht Frei !
Vote for Hr Cameron.

(You will find the voting booth at the end of the wagon-carriage, to the right of the guillotine)

* *

To THE CONNING TOWER:

The last of The Party Party Season 2013 is over and so to its aftermath :
(Once saw X in a delightful floral outfit falling out of New York New York.
Details returned on application made out in pencil on back of a £50 note with postage paid and enclosed SAE)
To Business Other of The Day:
David has been declared his symphony unfinished
and drifted into verbal diarrhoea in his parting speech repeating
[x16-23 times depending which report you listen to (actually)]
‘he has a BIG JOBBY to finish’ and the inevitable
‘Do you want total krieg?’ etc to the party faithful sheep assembled here
Oh well, we can’t blame The Jocks if Billy Connelly wasn’t available for the gig,
but Big Yin really would have been preferable to Big Din.
Aside:
I know it is a nice change for them but still Manc or not, it just isn’t the same as Nuremberg.
+
It must be said:
The assembled hacks this year have been remarkably something over the whole of                 The Games, but we can’t quite decide just wot !
+
So, the weary cast has completed their bit in this last show and now it’s all back to civilisation South of Watford for them ASAP but for the stragglers who can’t sober-up and will hang about making a nuisance of themselves ’till weekend.
NB. H&S: Watch-out in the bogs of The Britons Protection.
+
Not forgetting the transport mess in the middle of Manc:
It’ll be a struggle to get all back to normal as the DaveCo camp effectively strangled the tram system !
(Have a look at a map and see below)

+ + +

ODA Parting Shots:

1: We’ve sat on this for a few days in order to reflect:
That Blooming Affair of last week:
Arl Bet Thee Time again:
We feel happy with our stance of sticking the pin in @ ~x2 years on
and the view that Dear Godfrey will be welcomed back into the UKIP fold
with the predictable much wailing and killing (Halal of course) of fatted calves etc.
In epilogue* short to this side show and approprié to it all:
THERE IS NO BUSINESS LIKE SHOW BUSINESS.
(*Or should that be, ‘with ephod’ ?!)

2: NOW CAMERON D. (+ REST):
YOU’VE KNOCKED US OFF THE RAILS HERE IN MANC
AND FUCKED-OVER OUR NICE NEW TRAM SYSTEM IN ORDER TO MAKE YOURSELVES LOOK IMPORTANT
(Pretentious twats. Our Paki’s don’t give a shit about you either
AND
We’ve had to resort to ruddy buses – Wot do you think it is, a bloody privatised railway ?)
CAN WE HAVE SOME MORE BEER VOUCHERS DRIPPED DOWN FROM DER HAUPT TABLE TO BUILD A PROPER BY-PASS TRACK or FEW
AROUND CENTRAL MANC AND IN PARTICULAR ST PETERS BLOODY SQUARE
(if you’ll excuse the expression that is)
SO IF YOU SODS COME UP HERE AGAIN WE CAN IGNORE YOU PROPERLY,
YOU CAN CARRY-ON IN THE SPLENDID ISOLATION YOU CRAVE HAPPILY BULLSHITTING IN PEACE,
AND WE CAN GET TO WORK TO CARRY ON GRAFTING
TO PAY OUR TITHES TO SUPPORT YOU TWATS IN WESTMINSTER
?

3: ref The Spectator
ref 14-09-13 Issue
ref Faceplate + Piece proper to Pages 14+15:
We respectfully illustrate to you / remind you of,
a Mr Ross Clark’s analysis of things that go with a swing
(rather succinct & full we think):
‘THE PARTY’S OVER’

From The Sanctum Sanctorum:
Signing-off quietly, Old :

OH,
And Dave luvvy,
TAKE THAT FUCKIN’ OSBORNE THINGY WITH YOU AND KEEP IT DOWN THERE.

+ + +

GOD SAVE BORIS

+ + +

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ODA COLONIAL DESK

The western outpost has gone BUST !
(So they say)

Now JUST WOT POSITION is
Hymie taking on the long/short/medium/upside-down/inside-out/etc current bond issue ?
Get yer beer-vouchers at the ready !

(Buddy can you spare a plaster/ anything ?)

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ODA FOREIGN DESK

THOSE IN ISOLATION LOCAL
(Well near-ish – Off-lying ‘Continent’ type thingy)

As/ last
The Wops are going through one of their frequent bouts of parliamentary nonsense.
The Greccos are twisting everything to put a cap on Golden Dawn.
Garlec Beret is out to lunch.
but
Auntie Angela appears relatively happy and that’s all that matters.

🙂

~ ~ ~

THOSE IN ISOLATION FAR
THOSE WHO ARE REALLY REMOTE
[The poor souls who are even further past Stalybridge]

The Iraq mess : As/ last and still improving a little
+
ref The Recent Russian Gripping of Greenpeace Ship Arctic Sunrise
+ The Activists on board
+ The Journalists on board :
(ref Greenpeace Action off Murmansk 2013-Sep)

Events Since to Date:
The Greenpeace bods + Journo’s were put before a court in Murmansk.
No charges were laid, but all 30 are being detained for two months as Russian authorities
‘pursue an investigation around piracy charges’
(for <half a doz of them shinning-up a fucking great big hairy arsed oil rig and fixing a flag !)
Greenpeace lawyers have launched an appeal against the detentions.

That said, and all thankfully very well covered by
the International Media with especial ta’s to the Brit Brat Pack,
it did spawn a lovely quote from one of the captured hacks:
‘The criminal activity I am blamed for is called journalism. I will keep doing it’
Denis Sinyakov.
Freelance Photographer aboard the Arctic Sunrise when it was gripped by Big P&Co.

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ODA H&S NOTICE

We repeat for the last time this year:

UK : PLACES to AVOID
POLTICo MAIN CONFERENCES PUBLIC (!) 2013:

LibDem: (Autumn Conference : 2 of 2 of year)
GLASGOW
Saturday 14 September to Wednesday 18th September 2013. (Who gives a poo ?)
Labour:
BRIGHTON
Sunday 22 September to Wednesday 25 September 2013. (Oh wot joy has gone)

+

Con’s – A Party Party in Endings and A Party In Decline

(Doggy-bags to the buffet before they give the residue away to the locals to live on):
MANC
Sunday 29th September to Wednesday 2nd October 2013.

(Oh wot odours of joy have come and hopefully will now depart smartish)

+

For Survivors:
Decontamination units have been placed at all major traffic junctions
@ ~10 miles distance around the centres of this annual competition for

THE UK POLITICo PROFESSIONAL BULLSHITTER OF THE YEAR COMPETITION
for
JUST WHO CAN SELL THE BUGGERS THE BIGGEST ONE THIS YEAR ?

The Tony Blair Memorial Cup will be presented to the winner
in The Members Tea Room, after prayers, first Monday in Advent.

End of Race Report:
Farage N. on the UKIP mount was been passed by Milliwatt on a dressed-up old nag, but refused to give-up and keeps surging today up to the finishing line.
The current favourite, Driven-Dave, has come up on the inside but has stumbled twice or more after showing form (usual) – shaft the proles.

(Clegg N on Wooly-Nonce was discounted as a non-starter by the stewards and didn’t attract any pre-race interest from the punters anyway as previous form has shown the mount is quite liable to stop in mid course, eat anything handy, shit on it’s supporters and amble back to the safety of the stalls)

Race finished today with the high jump.
Results await Stewards Enquiry into Driven-Dave of whom it was found, was not carrying the specified weight having claimed that picking up the Wooly-Nonce rider, after his mount tried to shed him, was more than sufficient handicap for anyone.

Source:  Paddy Power (obviously)

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YE SUB NOTES

PRE : As/ last:
ref YE POSTS:
Continuing the opening of our Posts to Subscribers Service, we’re still stumbling a bit
(SNAFU)
and we continue to pray indulgence from our readers for the future hopefully short
until we have sorted formatting to as best as can be done for the system raft we float on.
Again, it looks as though there will only be x1/day as ye esteamed system won’t allow more.
Should you not receive for any day particular try accessing that particular one from the site proper.
SUNDAYS:  Expect pub’ of our std declaration of day of rest + any special notices of the time.
Future Intentions:
But for Sundays, to do a regular daily ‘double-do’ with AM+PM publications with an updated Asspect at PM
(See above, thought unlikely at the mo’ : Best laid plans etc !)

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THE STANDING NOTES

ref STYLE of WRITE

As/ The Site Proper.
NB Much but not all done to a continuous stream of script without punctuation proper or additional space break etc ie As/a continuous rant would sound as after all it is A RANT SITE

!

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ref YE SITE PROPER

THE WOM PAGE

1: As/ last:
Changes of layout to The Wom Page on the site proper are yet still continuing and might confuse a little at the mo’, as this past week/so of Daily Posts must have also done !
Again, please bear with us and it’ll be brought to logical soon
(If we are spared !)

2: ref THE DAILY + WEEKLY COPY USUAL:
Due to illness (ahhh we hear from the masses)
we’ve largely suspended the regulars full and proper:
The Daily Asspect + The Daily Enlightenment + The Weekly Look-Back
Do hope to be back up to full speed some time
In the meantime we précised/metamorphosed wot would have been full copy to the above into Organi’s view of the world:
The Fourth Eye of The Wom Page:
A summary posting of
DAILY ASSPECT + ENLIGHTENMENT + WEEKLY LOOK BACK PAGES

We now put The Fourth Eye to this (hopefully) daily posting

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ref THE TEXTUALS – THE DAILY ENLIGHTENMENT – THE STYLE
ref The Piece(s) Above + Previous + To Come (if we are spared)
ref The E-Steamed Wisdom Contained Therein:

For New Recipients – Yes, we do know:

1:
They are for the most part, gutter humour.
ie 1: They are quite, quite, quite  vulgar for the most part.
ie 2: They’re mostly quite crude, lewd and rude (some very much so)
+
Throw-in bland, infantile, inane, and gratuitously outrageous for good luck where they apply
(often !)
and you’ve got a fairly accurate picture of just wot is contained usual.
🙂
An Aside:
–> Ah, The Gutter : It’s where we live <–
No Apologies : There’s no place like home etc.
🙂
Ergo: Should you live on the kerb or above, some might well cause offence.
🙁
The easy way for the delicate to deal with it if you don’t want to
take heed of the sentiments of the nice polite version on The Site Proper Wom (Home) Page:
GO AWAY NOW.
aka Piss-Off You Princess.
🙁
🙂

2:
You might well have seen or heard said some of the pieces below somewhere else before,
indeed some of them are so old they’re probably pensionable,
but please don’t show-off by telling us where and when they seen.
To date gentlefolk other of
The Parish of St ODA
might well not have had the benefit of the profound illumination & enlightenment contained therein and shed by them.
We don’t claim copy-write on them – Share & Enjoy.

3:
With ref to the genre general:
The only things we’re trying to do for the better than the rest of the rabble,
is to publish in a form matching the idiom of the piece particular,
in as intelligible a form as can be writ by us with attempt to render print layout to wot is thought best practice for clarity of read on the many devices various ‘out there’.
Where possible for retention of that idiom intrinsic to the piece,
that form is put to something akin to The Queen’s English.
Oh, and we’re trying not to repeat the same one after publication as well.

* * *

So, Dear Reader,
The TEXTUALS in summation,
is a torrent of banal filth, innuendo, outrageous lies, smears and distortion,
general character assassination to bods various
all tastefully counterpointed with ‘politically incorrect’ anarchistic truths and insights
into the greater world
+
The ODD flash of divine inspiration and enlightenment absolute
combined with good taste proper
(Very few and little though !)
🙂
Further: See our

General Statements of Stance

on

The Site Proper

Wom* Page

also.

(* The ‘Home’ Page : Fer’t foreigners from past Stalybridge)

+ + +
A Sponsor Writes:

Reet Good.
Couldn’t do better mi sen.
Double coconuts all round.

Godd J.
Villa Omni
Heaven
H101 WC666
(No junk mail or callers without appointment please)
+ + +

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Clear Views
+
Regards,

Yours through das mist (ja wohl)
Old :

🙂

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